Monday! You Nearly Won!

MONDAAAAAAY! CURSE YOU, MONDAY!!

You started off strong. A bad night’s sleep and an early wake-up. Not a good sign.

Then I gained the upper hand with a good workout, a delicious breakfast and (crucially!) a cup of tea.

Despite rearing your ugly head from time to time throughout the day, I managed to keep you mostly at bay. We got some books from the library (though you tried to throw out my back with the weight of them!). We took a walk and threw random stuff off a bridge into a creek. We had an outdoor get-together with some friends this afternoon!

It really seemed like I had taken the field and Monday wasn’t going to be a thing this week.

Then Came Monday Evening

When you have a picky eater, mealtimes are always fraught. Rather than enjoying your own meal, you’re having to negotiate each bite into a 3-year-old’s mouth.

We have a “one bite of everything” rule, and you’d think that would be doable, right?

Noooooooo… There’s a lot of whining involved.

Then, said 3-year-old decides he needs to use the toilet. He complains about needing help (he doesn’t need help). He goes into the bathroom and closes the door.

Soon, a little squeaky voice says, “Oh Mama! There’s peepee on the floor!”

Turns out, because it’s Monday, he decided to pee standing up. With the toilet seat down. And his toilet seat insert on.

Of course there’s peepee on the floor! The hole is now so small, not even the most experienced peer could pee into that without at least sprinkling!

So now there’s pee on the toilet. On his clothes. On his slippers. On the floor. On the rug.

Bathtime.

As we’re negotiating getting the (naked) boys upstairs, we hear a mysterious crash from the laundry room. “It’s probably the mop that’s fallen–I just stuck it back in there quickly after mopping up the bathroom.” No further thought given.

Bath. Bed. Stories. Only one brief meltdown.

Back downstairs. Open the laundry room…

HUSBAND NEARLY KILLS HIMSELF SLIPPING IN VISCOUS GOO!

The vibrations from the laundry machine sent the new, full, ENORMOUS vat of laundry detergent crashing to the floor. First it ricocheted off the top of the washer, knocking the cap off and cracking it.

So while we were putting the boys to bed, its contents were slowly leaking out onto the laundry room floor.

(Pro tip: use a dustpan to scoop up the bulk of the goo and then wipe the rest up with towels before mopping the floor.)

Surrender

That’s it. I was about to surrender. Monday, it seemed, had won.

But then I remembered!

I remembered the West Cork Irish Whiskey in the fake liquor cabinet! I remembered the lemon in the crisper drawer! I found the honey pot! And I made…

HOT TODDIES!!!

Take THAT, Monday! You thought you could beat me?! Not when I have the ingredients for hot toddies!

(And one of those nice microwavable warming cushions to drape around my neck.)

Sláinte!

Jane

The Brain In Jane works mainly in the rain. It's always raining somewhere. Find me on Twitter, Google+, and Pinterest.

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