Author: Jane

The Brain In Jane works mainly in the rain. It's always raining somewhere. Find me on Twitter, Google+, and Pinterest.

Since When Are We “Post-Covid”?

Jane 1 Comment

Update 08/01/2021

“We gotta talk about your post.” That was the text message I got from my sister-in-law: epidemiologist and kick-ass lady in general. “I think you can add to it to make it better.”

My SIL’s point, and the one which I did not clearly make in the article below, is this:

Vaccination is the solution to a post-Covid world.

Breakthrough infections are EXTREMELY rare. Vaccinated people who have died of Covid had underlying conditions.

The way we protect those who are immunocompromised and those who are too young to get vaccinated is by getting vaccinated ourselves.

So get vaccinated.

Full. Stop.

I’m adding this to the top of this article because, as my SIL pointed out, I did not say this in my post. It wasn’t clear at all. I’m going to leave the original post below so that everyone can see how sometimes I can completely miss making any kind of productive point in an article. Most of the time, that doesn’t really matter. But when it comes to public health information, it is extremely important to be clear.

I was not clear. My mistake. And I’m so glad I have such awesome readers who aren’t afraid to give me feedback. Love you, SIL.

Original Post

Am I missing something here?

More than 610,000 people have died of Covid-19 in the United States.

That’s over 110,000 lives lost since February 22nd, when the president held a memorial ceremony for the victims of Covid-19 at the White House.

This month, the number of infections has risen in more than two dozen states. The Delta variant is spreading rapidly and according to data from the Washington Post (link above), the death rate among unvaccinated people is as high as it was among the population in general last January.

So, why am I hearing and reading about a “post-covid” world?

An Inconvenient Reality

The hard truth is that this virus is still spreading, infecting and killing people. Even here in the United States, where 50% of the population has received at least one dose of vaccine.

The unvaccinated are dying–young and old.

I’ve heard people scoff and say, “They brought it on themselves”–but my stomach turns at that attitude. These are human beings, lives and families we’re talking about.

Who knows why a person hasn’t been vaccinated? Perhaps they’re under the age of 12 and cannot be vaccinated yet.

Perhaps they can’t because of autoimmune issues. Maybe they have access issues and cannot get to where they can get vaccinated.

And yes, maybe some are refusing to get vaccinated because of misguided beliefs. But they’re still people, fellow citizens and human beings, and their deaths are just as tragic as those that went before them.

Living in a Bubble

We’ve “opened up” in our area, with masks no longer mandated and capacity limits lifted in restaurants and other venues. As of yesterday, our county has a 54.2% vaccination rate.

Some establishments still require masks when indoors, but the vast majority of people are going around maskless, including young, unvaccinated kids.

My worry is what will happen if and when this bubble bursts.

Breakthrough infections DO happen, and vaccinated people have died of Covid-19. Admittedly, most vaccinated people who have ended up hospitalized with Covid-19 have had severe underlying conditions, but still.

The fact remains that vaccines do not always protect from infection (they are effective in preventing severe illness and death, yes, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get infected).

And once you are infected, data show that you can still pass it on to those around you.

Why I’m Still Masking

Yes, the probability of my getting infected is low.

And if I get infected, the probability of my passing on the infection to my unvaccinated children is very low.

But I don’t care if the chances are one in 1,000,000. As long as there is a chance of that happening, I will wear a mask.

And I will have my children wear masks.

Come the school year, they may be the only ones wearing masks in their classes (though somehow I doubt that). But at this point I consider wearing a mask much like wearing a helmet on a bicycle. I don’t care if your friends don’t do it.

You will.

And so will I.

I Get Some Looks

People look at me funny now when I have my mask on indoors. They may think I’m an anti-vaxxer who has refused to get the shot.

Or perhaps they think I’m being obnoxious and making a political statement.

You may think so, but honestly my wearing a mask is not intended to be a political statement. My thinking goes like this:

I’ve just been traveling internationally (to a country the State Department and the CDC agree is a hotbed for the Delta variant).

Wouldn’t it stink if I unwittingly got infected (remember: getting infected is not the same as getting sick with Covid!) and passed it on to you?

And wouldn’t it stink if you were one of those 5% of people whose vaccine doesn’t successfully protect against severe illness?

Wouldn’t that stink?

I Can Handle Looks

Yes, the likelihood is low. Yet it still exists.

So glare away. I’m going to keep masking for now. At least until both our children are fully vaccinated. And maybe longer. We’ll see.

I invite you to join me.

Let’s put up with a little inconvenience and discomfort for now, in order to better enjoy that Post-Covid world when it really comes.

Image source

Yarn-stores-in-montreal

Impulse Purchase & Ensuing Guilt

Jane Leave a comment

I *like* to think I’m not a big spender.

I don’t enjoy shopping. Whether it’s for clothes, food, or even books, I’m just not that into it.

However, as I’ve moved further into the knitting world, one form of shopping has become more of a pleasure than a chore.

That is: yarn shopping!

What is it about Yarn?

Yarn is so full of possibilities.

An unwound hank of yarn, twisted into a skein, sparks the imagination. Whether it’s the color or the texture, with just a little creative thinking, it can become a luxurious cabled sweater, a drapey shawl, or a cozy hat.

The thing is, I’m not talking about just any kind of yarn.

The Kind of Yarn Matters

When I first learned to crochet, I would use whatever yarn was available and affordable. Mostly, that was 100% acrylic yarn.

Acrylic yarn has its uses and I don’t want to knock it. But when we were living in Montreal, I joined a Stitch n’ Bitch knitting group.

Through the Stitch n’ Bitch ladies, I succumbed to the love of fine yarns.

Merino, silk, alpaca, mohair, cashmere, donegal tweed, yak, camel…

Once you knit with these (or a combination of any of them!), you’re done. It’s really hard to go back once you get used to the feeling of these yarns in your hands.

How Temptation Arose

You guys know I knit a lot. I really like it. As I’ve written here before, it’s a big part of my mental health regime.

I usually buy yarn with a specific project in mind. It’s true that I don’t always end up knitting what I had planned with the yarn, but that’s beside the point.

It’s not like the yarn is going to go to waste! But it’s true that I have accumulated a healthy stash of nice yarns.

While we were on vacation, I finished my “dotted rays” shawl by Stephen West. Foolishly, I had not considered the possibility that I would actually finish it, and failed to plan for another travel project.

What to do??

At home, I have patterns. At home, I have yarns for those patterns.

Unwisely, I made my way to the internet, where luxurious yarns are readily available for purchase.

Any yarn I ordered online would not be available to me until I got home!

And yet, I ordered it.

Hence, my guilt.

Why I Feel Guilty

Partially, it’s the the fact that I already had plenty of yarn.

But it’s also an insidious phenomenon that many people (especially women) suffer from: namely, feeling guilty for spending money on something that is purely for pleasure.

It’s ironic: so much of what is marketed to us involves pleasure. Food that tastes good, amazing vacation destinations for travel, etc.

But when you think about it, most of what is marketed to women as “pleasure products” are self-care products like soaps, shampoos, spas, manicures, makeup…

All things to make ourselves look more appealing to others (read: men).

When women choose to spend money on anything that isn’t for our families, or to make us more attractive to the men in our lives, we are taught to be ashamed.

We can even feel guilty for purchasing books, for goodness sake!

Swallow the Guilt

Unless you are spending money you cannot afford to, I say: swallow the guilt.

We need to get over it. As long as our spending isn’t irresponsible, why should we feel any guilt on the score?

Okay, so admittedly I probably should not have made the purchase I did. I didn’t need the yarn, it wasn’t cheap, and I had other projects ready.

But I will not beat myself up for giving into temptation and indulging in an impulse purchase.

(Really! I won’t! Or at least I’ll try not to…)

What Are Your Impulse Purchases Like?

What do you spend money on and then feel slightly guilty about later? What are your indulgences?

I want to know I’m not alone!

You’re Still Not on Ravelry?!

Jane Leave a comment

It has come to my attention that there are knitters out there who are still unaware of Ravelry.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? Do you live under a ROCK??

Not to make you feel bad or anything, but you are missing out on so many wonderful features that will add to your enjoyment and delight in knitting!

What’s Ravelry?

Ravelry.com is a magical combination of social media platform and mega pattern & yarn information database.

You must create a username and password to access the platform, but it is completely free to do so. Once you’re a member, you have at your fingertips a library of hundreds of thousands of knitting and crochet patterns.

Many of them are free to download, and others you have to pay for. The staggering number of over 500,000 patterns can be a little misleading because they’re not all necessarily available to download. Anyone can add a pattern to Ravelry, even if it’s a pattern from an old magazine for instance. But mostly, you’ll find a pattern that is at least available somewhere online, even if not directly on Ravelry.

Some of My Favorite Ravelry Features

Aside from the enormous list of available patterns, there are many features I love on Ravelry.

1. Advanced Search Filters

First, I love the pattern search filter options. When you’re looking for something to knit, you can search by almost any possible category you can think of.

The Advanced Search option lets you choose by craft (knit, crochet or both), category (garment, accessory, toy, home decor), whether it’s available to download, yarn weight, design attributes… SO MANY OPTIONS!

I love using this when I have some yarn and I don’t know what to do with it. I’ll search by weight, yardage and how many colors I have. Though I’m not usually a stasher (I buy yarns with a specific pattern in mind), when I’ve had a stray skein or two this has been so helpful.

2. Projects

Though this requires a bit of input, I love the option you have to add projects to your profile. You create a project and you can include so much information: the yarn you use, the needles, who you’re making it for, sizing, etc.

If the pattern exists on Ravelry, you can automatically populate a lot of the details in your project. As soon as you link your project to a pattern, it is then visible from that pattern’s Ravelry page.

I always try to add photos (because it’s one thing to see the designer’s photos of the pattern, and it’s another thing entirely to see how the piece looks when other crafters knit it).

You can also write notes, which I always try to do. Why? Because I LOVE it when other Ravelers write detailed notes on their projects. When I’m thinking of knitting a pattern, I’ll comb through others people’s projects and read their notes.

You can even search through projects linked to a pattern and filter your search by whether or not the project has notes, and if other Ravelers (yes! That’s what we’re called!) have identified them as helpful.

In my notes, I’ll include links to videos I used for techniques, or to blog articles I found helpful. I’ll also make a note of changes I’ve made in the pattern, or issues I encountered. A couple of my projects have been added to peoples’ favorites because of my detailed notes, so that’s great!

3. Yarn Reviews

Especially when I’m shopping for yarn online, I don’t like to buy without first checking out the yarn’s Ravelry page.

There are SO many yarns listed on Ravelry, that unless you’re talking about a really small scale dyer, or someone who simply isn’t online, you’re pretty sure to find your yarn there.

You can search by fibre, by weight, you can look up your local yarn shop (assuming they’re on Ravelry!)… There are just so many options.

Most importantly, I look at the ratings and the comments (if any). People will give feedback on how the yarn feels, how it holds up after washing, whether it pills or splits, and more.

If you’re looking to try out a new yarn, the Ravelry yarn database is a good first stop for info.

4. Stashing

This also requires a lot of input, but it’s worth it if you take the time. If you keep your stash updated on Ravelry, you can more easily search for patterns to match your stash. You also don’t have to go pulling out all your yarns every time you’re thinking of what to knit.

Simplify your life, add to the power of Ravelry and stash your yarns!

I’ve also actually managed to buy and sell leftover or unwanted skeins by listing it in my stash as “will trade or sell.” If you’re suffering from stash guilt, I suggest you give that a try…

There’s So Much More

There is a whole lot more to love about Ravelry. I don’t use the forum feature much at all, but that is a huge part of the community for many people.

You can also join groups of your favorite designers and sign up to do test knits of new patterns. I follow many designers, but since I don’t spend time in the forums I never learn about a potential test knit in time.

Lots of people make heavy use of the queue feature (basically, listing what you’re going to knit next), but again I haven’t been very good about that. It is a nice thing to use, especially if you keep your pattern library and your stash up to date!

I strongly recommend you check out Ravelry if you haven’t already. Play around with it, because there are so many ways to make it work for you!

It will add to your enjoyment of knitting or crochet, and it also helps to foster a sense of community. You can add friends on Ravelry (careful! This is not like Facebook where you have to approve friends–you can be added by anyone, so be aware before you put too much personal info in).

Look me up: I’m thebraininjane and I’d love to see what you’re making!

We Snuck Off On Vacation

Jane Leave a comment

Now that we’re back and our house hasn’t been broken into and all seems well, I can tell you that we snuck away on vacation!

Honestly, I was very apprehensive about flying during a pandemic. But we did it, and it was TOTALLY worth it!

Buying the Flights

Chico is the family travel agent. He does all the booking of flights, paying for checked bags and choosing seats. I have had plenty of experience doing these things, but because this is an area of interest of his, I let him handle it.

The prices were good. We were lucky in that we booked early enough, before prices skyrocketed. Chico did have to sleuth around a bit, but he found us transatlantic flights for a reasonable price.

Our flights were with multiple Star Alliance airlines, and we had difference stopover cities for the flight there and the return. If you see this kind of booking, just be aware that it can complicate things a bit, just in terms of airline health requirements, local Covid-19 restrictions in your stopover countries, etc.

Check for Checked Bags

Beware, though! We were always used to getting one checked back per traveler included in our international air fare, but it would seem that in a post-pandemic world that is not necessarily the norm.

We had to pay for one checked bag on our way to Europe. On the way back, we remembered we had a Star Alliance gold card, and called the airline ahead of our flight to ask about checked bags. We were told that we were allowed ONE checked bag (we had purchased four tickets), but we would have to pay for a second checked suitcase. BUT we couldn’t do it over the phone or online (confusing!) and would have to do it at the check-in desk upon arrival at the airport for our flight.

In the end, we just went to the check-in desk on the morning of our flight and presented two suitcases to check-in. The airline employee didn’t bat an eyelash and did not charge us for either bag. Go figure!

To Pay for Seats or Not

If you’ve booked a flight for your whole family, you will automatically be seated together (or at least close together). This is especially true if you’re traveling with underage kids.

You will have the option to pay to secure your preferred seats (this was true before Covid, too). I would only suggest you do this if you have strong feelings about where you sit on the plane (forward or aft, close to the toilets or not, aisle seat or window, etc.).

The major difference since Covid is that flight attendants will not let you change seats once you’re on the flight. Even if your flight isn’t full, they may not let you relocate. It’s because they want to be able to do accurate contact tracing should anyone on the flight later test positive for Covid-19.

Knowing that, you can decide whether or not you want to fork out for your seats ahead of time.

Pre-Travel Covid Tests

Whether you have to take a Covid test before you travel will depend on several things:

  1. Your airline–or airlines if your trip is with multiple carriers
  2. The country where you’re stopping over (if applicable)
  3. Your final destination

A couple of weeks before you fly, you’ll want to get onto the airline’s website and read up on their requirements. You’ll also want to check requirements at your destination and in your stopover countries.

We actually got emails from the airlines ahead of our trip, which was very helpful. However, one of the airline’s information was confusing so we ended up giving them a call.

On our way to Europe, we did not have to have Covid tests. Tests were not required for those who are vaccinated, and they were not required for children under age 12. We just made sure we had printed out our vaccination certification from the CDC.

On the way back, the United States requires Covid tests for all travellers over the age of 2, regardless of whether you’re vaccinated or not. The good news was that both the United States and Germany (our stopover country on the way home) allowed the rapid antigen tests.

Was it Worth it, Though?

ABSOLUTELY.

We desperately needed to see our family. And they were desperate for us to come. (Since the US is still not allowing travellers from Europe, that was the only option.)

Also, Chico hadn’t had a proper vacation since we moved to the States. We were away for 2.5 weeks, and for one week Chico was actually on vacation (the rest of the time he worked remotely). He turned off his phone for several days, and we loved every minute of it.

We spent quality time with grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins. In Spain, people do not consider wearing a mask to be a political issue, and everyone wore masks everywhere (other than in the home). It was remarkable and very comforting.

We may not be able to travel internationally as much as we used to in the future, but that will make each visit all the more special.

Despite the stress of international travel, despite the anxiety about Covid, the Delta variant, etc., we would absolutely do this again.

It was absolutely, totally worth it.

Almost A Month Off Facebook

Jane Leave a comment

I did it!

I downloaded all my data and deleted my Facebook profile.

Facebook gives you 30 days to change your mind, so I actually still have until July 8th to stop the deletion.

But I don’t think I’m gonna.

Haven’t Missed It

It’s been nearly a month, and I have yet to feel like I miss Facebook. True, I can conceivably think of a situation or two where I might wish I had it.

As I said before, the Buy Nothing™ groups on Facebook are great. I’ve been able to give away a number of items, and also procure some really good things, thanks to my local group.

I was just thinking to myself, “Man, I wonder how I can access the Buy Nothing community without being on Facebook?”

It turns out, they’re launching their own app! It’s in beta right now, but it’s launched in a few cities (mostly Stateside), and you can sign up to get on the waitlist. I’ve signed up and I’m looking forward to it being available!

Alternatives to Facebook

I’m still using Instagram, though more and more I’m finding the mindless scrolling less fulfilling. The family members and friends I initially followed on there have either quit or are posting less, so what shows up in my feed is not as interesting to me anymore.

Nextdoor

On a local level, there’s Nextdoor. Nextdoor is a social networking site based on neighborhoods and communities. It’s a lot like Facebook in that you can post photos, videos, links, text, etc, but what you post is visible not just to “friends” but also to your neighbors.

You don’t choose your neighbors, so it’s not like Facebook where you approve friends. You can make your privacy settings more or less strict (only neighbors, neighbors and surrounding neighborhoods, or everyone on Nextdoor).

It’s got to be said that you get a lot of strange people on Nextdoor. It seems that many folks join just to whine and complain about their neighbors. Most people, though, are friendly and share useful tidbits. It’s similar to Facebook in that you’ll see lots of ads, but at least these are usually for useful local services and businesses.

Meetup

In the past, I’ve used Meetup.com, but it seems to me that it’s not very popular in the States. That’s probably because Facebook is so prevalent and because Meetup charges group administrators a yearly fee. I haven’t been on there in nearly two years.

Ravelry

Ravelry is my knitting social networking site. I try to keep my profile and projects updated there, and it’s my go-to for patterns, inspiration, yarn reviews… everything! I LOVE Ravelry!

Goodreads

For all your literary social networking needs, Goodreads.com is the place to be. I’ve had a profile on here for years, but since I’m now in a country where I have easier access to English-language reading materials, I am using it much more than I used to.

I like seeing what people are reading, what they think of their reads, and also following authors that I like. I read my first Louise Erdrich novel recently, and I’m very excited to read more!

That May Seem Like a Lot…

Sure, that’s a lot of social networks to be on at once. And I’m not even up-to-date on TikTok, SnapChat or any of the other cool platforms the kids are using these days.

What I like about the platforms I mentioned above is that they’re very focused. Aside from Meetup (that I really don’t use anymore), they each have a specific area of focus: neighborhood stuff, knitting, books. I like that they each have their theme. Often, they overlap, and it’s wonderful when they do. But it’s also okay to keep interests and hobbies separate. I don’t feel like it’s too much “work” to maintain these profiles because they’re activities I enjoy.

Not Cold Turkey

All that to say that I’m not off social media altogether. And who knows, something may bring me back to Facebook someday. But so far, the cord cut has felt really good, and it hasn’t been as scary or as isolating as I thought.

Are you thinking of giving it a try? I’d love to hear about it!

Knitted Knockers (or Knot!)

Jane Leave a comment

It’s time for another knitting post! This time, I have knitted what might be called a “medical accessory”: Knitted Knockers!

Knitted Knockers are knitted breast prosthesis, designed to be comfortable, lightweight and soft. The Knitted Knockers foundation registers medical providers to sign up to receive knitted prosthesis for their patients. The foundation also gets the word out to knitters and crocheters all over the US to invite them to make and donate knockers.

Makers can choose from several different approved knockers patterns: click here to see all the different pattern options! The foundation also provides a list of approved yarns. The yarns must be cotton–no wool!

Once you’ve made your knockers from approved yarn and the official pattern, you mail them to the foundation (unstuffed) for quality control. They’ll take a look at the sizing, at your gauge, and at the quality of the knitting. If they meet the foundation’s quality standards, they’ll stuff them and get them out to medical providers and clinics who need them.

There is very high demand for these, and when I first heard about them I thought it was a brilliant idea. I didn’t realize how soon I’d need to make them for someone I loved.

Knockers Needed

In December, we learned that a family member needed to have a double mastectomy. Always a scary prospect, we were especially worried about her going into hospital due to Covid (this was before many people were vaccinated).

Thankfully, all went well, and once the procedure was over, the prognosis was very good. Of course, recovery wasn’t easy and naturally the scars from the procedure are significant and uncomfortable.

That’s when I thought of Knitted Knockers. Of course, offering to knit someone breast prosthetics isn’t covered in any etiquette guidelines I know of. I wasn’t sure how to proceed and I didn’t want to be indelicate or offend.

Thankfully, this person is a crafter herself, and we have always enjoyed chatting about knitting, crocheting and other crafts together. So I decided to make the offer in the most straightforward and friendly way possible.

My offer was well received, and it was taken absolutely in the spirit it was meant: with love.

The Knitty Gritty Details

We consulted on size and color, and I decided to knit a size A in Cascade Ultra Pima cotton yarn (color “buff”–as in, “in the–“!).

For the pattern, I chose the latest version of the knitted pattern: Bottoms up in the round on DPNs. The original pattern started at the front of the knocker (at the nipple, essentially), with only three stitches cast on, and increased from there. Many knitters found that to be difficult and fiddly, so the pattern designer, Claudia Barbo, wrote a new version in which you knit the knockers from back to front. In this version, you cast on 15 stitches, which is a lot easier to manage than just three!

My yarn was a DK weight, and the pattern called for 3.75mm needles. However, I didn’t have DPNs in that size, and since my gauge tends to be tight anyway, I went up to 4mm.

I have to admit that I am not crazy about working on DPNs. The pattern tells you to divide the stitches by three and always keep them on the same needles. This creates a gap between the stitches on each end of the needles. Usually, when I’m knitting on DPNs, I rotate around so that my needles don’t always change at the same spot.

I followed the pattern, and here’s the result:

Not the most even stitching…

The Knitted Result

Though pretty, I was not crazy with the unevenness of the stitches. Also, the decreases on the front of the knocker (what you’re looking at in this picture) created ridges which met in the middle and formed what looked like a “nipple”. Washing and pinning it out to dry helped to reduce that, but still. It could have been smoother.

Also, it was too small! When the knockers arrived at their destination and were stuffed, they were about two sizes too small.

No problemo! That’s an easy one to solve: just make it bigger!

The issue of the “nipple” created by the decreases required some trial and error.

Yarny Experimenting

There are several different patterns available on the Knitted Knockers site. I decided to try the original pattern, starting with just 3 stitches and increasing from there.

However, it was really fiddly. I had trouble keeping my needles straight and making it look any good.

Then, I tried using the pinhole cast on:

It’s a beautiful cast on, but even doing this there were ridges that wouldn’t have been smooth enough.

I tried a few more times, but I really wasn’t happy with how it was turning out.

Then, I had an epiphany:

I Know How to Crochet!

That’s right! I know how to crochet! And the crocheted knockers looked fantastic!

And so, I dusted off the ol’ crochet hooks. They haven’t seen daylight in quite a while, and I had to re-learn how to hold the yarn in my left hand. But muscle memory kicked in really quickly, and before long I had cast on using the magic ring and was chugging along.

Using the same yarn and a 4mm crochet hook, I whipped them up pretty quickly:

Tah-daaahh!

I was SO happy with how these turned out! Though denser than the knitted version, they are far smoother. I washed and dried them and they came out very soft.

Crocheted Knockers (not as catchy…)

So they’re not knitted, but they look great. They’re on their way to their recipient, and I’m awaiting feedback on these. Hopefully they’ll be as comfortable as their knitted counterparts!

You can read all the details about my knitted knockers and my crocheted knockers on my Ravelry page.

I made two sets of knockers using one skein of yarn. I have a whole other skein, so I will either make more upon request for my family member, or I’ll donate some!

Quitting Facebook

Jane 4 Comments

I’ve written about this before. Many times.

Even a short period of time spent on Facebook leaves me feeling at best lethargic, at worst angry.

I haven’t been writing much on the blog lately, and that reflects in the amount of time I (haven’t) spent on Facebook. I only really go on to post my blog articles anyway.

After being off it for so long, I felt absolutely no desire to go back on. Maybe that’s part of why I haven’t been writing much on here. I didn’t want to feel like I had to go back on Facebook to share my articles.

Back on Facebook for a Visit

Yesterday, I published a blog article. My blog automatically posts to my “thebraininjane” Facebook page, but I need to actually go write a post on my own profile in order to share my articles there.

With some trepidation, I opened Facebook in my browser.

The first thing that I saw was that I had dozens of notifications. The little red notification icon with the number in it is just irresistible. I clicked on it.

Immediately I saw updates from friends, mentions of me in comments on posts I was clueless about, and all kinds of other things I had been perfectly happy not knowing about.

Almost Down the Rabbit Hole

Before I knew it, I had been ten minutes getting myself up to speed on a thread I had commented on weeks before and lost track of.

I hadn’t even seen the time go by! I had only wanted to post my article and leave!

I yanked myself out of the rabbit hole and quickly marked all notifications as “read”. I shared the link to my article, and closed the window in my browser.

Then I sent a text message to my sister-in-law (dear friend and beloved recipient of the Weekender sweater). I told her how I’d nearly gone down the rabbit hole.

Her response was pretty much perfect: “Facebook is not for me.”

Wow.

How simple. How uncomplicated! How true! HOW LIBERATING!

What To Do Now?

It became clear to me then and there that I want to delete my Facebook account.

And not just “deactivate”. No no no, I want to actually delete my account. I don’t want Facebook retaining information about me.

(Yes, yes, I know Facebook has my information on Whatsapp and Instagram, and don’t even get started on how much Google knows about me. Baby steps, people!)

My first step was to google (I know) “how to delete my Facebook account”. The first result was this C-Net article, published only a few days ago, which gives helpful step-by-step instructions.

Let People Know

One of the only things that I like about using Facebook is Messenger. I haven’t had the Facebook app on my phone or tablet for nearly four years now, but I have kept the Messenger app. I think that’s been one of my main reasons for keeping my account: having that ability to write to a Facebook contact if I want to.

The C-Net article recommends posting a status update a few days before deleting your account by way of an announcement. Let people know you’re closing your account and ask them to send you other contact info by Messenger.

Let this post serve as my notification: I’M QUITTING FACEBOOK!

Send me your contact deets, folks. I’ll actually create a contact for you in my address book! Imagine that!

What I’ll Miss

As a hopeless extrovert, I will miss the possibility of getting in touch with people from my past out of the blue. It’s nice to think of a person, remember them for some reason, and write them a little note to say you’re thinking of them. I’ll miss that.

I’ll also miss the local stitch n’ bitch group. There’s something about crafty people who knit and crochet that makes them some of the craziest, zaniest and most entertaining people around. The group will continue to meet, and though I may miss out on things online, I definitely won’t miss out when we meet in person again.

Finally, it’s true that there are lots of really fun and interesting Facebook groups out there. I’ve enjoyed my local Buy Nothing group tremendously. I worry that cutting myself off from Facebook will also mean cutting myself off from groups like these.

Maybe it will. But maybe that’s okay? We’ll see.

Quitting Facebook Feels Scary

Maybe it’s FOMO, maybe it’s because I’m such an extrovert. But the idea of quitting Facebook feels scary. Though I spend maybe 10 minutes out of every two weeks on the platform now, its just being there as an option feels reassuring.

But everyone I know who has taken this step has not regretted it. They’ve never looked back.

It seems that slowly weaning ourselves off of social media is, dare I say it, healthy? Perhaps it’s because social media is so hard to do in moderation. You’re either not on, or your doom scrolling.

Between the two, I’d rather be off it altogether.

I’ll keep you posted!

Another Weekend(er)

Jane Leave a comment

Yet another sweater has come off my needles!

I finished my own Weekender last year, and as soon as it came off the blocking mats I knew it was something special.

I wore the thing all winter and didn’t put it away until only about ten days ago. (Full confession: I washed it when I blocked it, and then didn’t wash it again until just before I put it away for the season. Wool really is a wonder fabric.)

As soon as I finished my own version of the Weekender (by designer Andrea Mowry), I knew I wanted to knit one for everyone I loved. Everyone should be this comfortable and cozy all winter long!

Yarn Choice: NOT Superwash!

My Minnesotan sister-in-law was top of my list, as I had not yet knitted her something. I turned to trusty Knit Picks for yarns, and sent her different color options.

I made the mistake, however, of suggesting a superwash yarn. I realized later that this would simply not do!

Why not, you ask? Superwash yarn is so convenient! It’s machine-washable! Perfect for gifts!

A Brief Lesson in Superwash Wool

Well, yes and no. Superwash yarn is treated so that it won’t felt when it’s washed.

Each strand of wool yarn has little scales or fibers that stick off it (imagine those little amoebas with the flagella that help them move–kind of like that). Those scales are what cause yarn to felt to itself when agitated (aka thrown in the washer).

To make a yarn “superwash” it is treated with chemicals to strip those scales, and then coated in a resin to make it super smooth. Great! You can now machine wash your knits without worry!

Aside from the environmental concerns some have over this treatment, removing those little scales also has its drawbacks. Those little hairs, when not agitated and felted together, help a knitted fabric to hold its shape. By removing them completely, the yarn doesn’t stick to itself at all.

What does that mean? Well, when you’re knitting something small and rather light, it’s no big deal. Shawls and scarfs are fine, even mittens or a hat. But something larger and heavier, like a sweater, will simply STRETCH OUT.

Sweaters knitted with superwash wool are famous for being ENORMOUS once they come out of the machine. Some people insist you must also tumble dry the sweater for it to regain some of its shape, and I’ve heard people have had success with that. However, the idea of tumble drying wool is just too terrifying to me.

And so, despite having ordered a lovely batch of superwash wool from Knit Picks, I sent it back and instead ordered this:

Knit Pick’s City Tweed Aran yarn in color “Blue Blood”

Swatching & Gauge

The Weekender is knit in worsted weight yarn. However, the City Tweed Aran yarn I used is a “heavy worsted” or aran-weight yarn.

I have a somewhat tight gauge, so I cast on for my swatch using the needle size recommended in the pattern. For my own Weekender, I had used regular worsted weight yarn and I had had to go up a needle size. This time, I got it right on the first try!

The Weekender is knit in the round, meaning it’s knit on circular needles and you’re always knitting, never purling. Therefore, your swatch should also be knit this way. However, casting on a little tube of knitting is really annoying. So here’s a trick:

I knitted this swatch flat in the round. Whaaaaat?? you say? Yes, it’s confusing. No, it’s not difficult. Check out this video from VeryPink Knits and skip to minute 3:05. She’ll show you how to do it.

I hit gauge bang on the nose with 4.5mm needles.

Cast-On, Ribbing and Joining in the Round

Andrea Mowry has you do a tubular cast-on for the Weekender. It’s a lovely cast on and definitely worth the trouble. However, I couldn’t make heads or tails of her video. So I went back to my trusty knitting teacher, Staci Perry of VeryPink Knits:

I cast on 55 stitches to get the required 109 stitches for my pattern. After chugging along happily on my ribbing (front and back), I was ready to join to knit in the round.

Now I am convinced there is an error in the pattern. Andrea says to finish the back and front ribbing with a RS (right side) row, and to then start your stockinette stitch. However, when you do that, the “seam” stitch that runs up the middle of the front and back of the sweater doesn’t line up with a knit stitch in the ribbing. It lines up with a purl stitch.

That bothered me to no end. At first I thought I had misread the pattern. But this had happened when I knit my own Weekender last year, and a girlfriend had also had the same problem.

So I will add this correction to the pattern: Finish the ribbing on a WS (wrong side) row, and then join to work in the round and start your stockinette.

Body & Shoulder Shaping

The only modification I made in the body was to make it about 5 inches longer, as per my SIL’s request.

Before casting on, she had provided me some measurements from a favorite sweater of hers. Based on those, I’d selected which size to knit for her Weekender, and then planned some changes accordingly.

After chugging up the main body, I separated for the front and back. I always realize, when switching from knitting in the round to knitting back and forth, how much I dislike purling. Luckily, this pattern doesn’t require much.

Then at the shoulder shaping it was time for… SHORT ROWS! Some people love them, some hate them. Ever since discovering German short rows, I have grown to love them.

German short rows are simply a way of avoiding doing the traditional “wrap and turn” short row, which then requires you to do a fiddly move to “pick up” the wraps when you’re done with your short rows. They can be substituted in any pattern.

Here’s Staci Perry’s very helpful video:

When I had first finished my short rows, I looked at the purl side of the work and was a little nervous about how it looked. The Weekender is knit in the round on the “wrong side” and then turned inside-out when you’re done with the body. So it’s actually the purl side which shows on the finished sweater.

Luckily, blocking worked its magic as usual, and all the bulky wonkiness of the short rows vanished after my Weekender had had a good bath.

Unblocked, after joining at the shoulders

I did the shoulder ribbing as per the instructions. However, I did not use the tubular bind off as suggested by Andrea Mowry for the neckline.

When I tried the tubular bind off on my own Weekender back in 2020, I followed the written instructions in the pattern and found it way too tight and very uncomfortable. According to Staci Perry’s video, it’s supposed to be really stretchy, so I must have been doing it wrong. Perhaps another time I’ll try it again.

In any case, I successfully managed the 3-needle bind off for the shoulders (after dropping a stitch and having to work it back up nearly half the body of the sweater–but never mind, it all worked out), and I was ready for my sleeves!

Sleeve Island!

Hooray for Sleeve Island! To fit with the measurements my SIL had given me, I went up two sizes for the sleeves. I found the sleeves on my own Weekender a little snug, and according to the schematic, they would not have been comfortable for my SIL. Instead of picking up the number of stitches for the size 3, I picked up the number for the size 5.

I knitted the sleeves for my own Weekender at the same time using magic loop. This time, I decided to knit them one at a time, and I was glad I did!

When picking up stitches for the first sleeve, I made the mistake of not picking up a stitch right at the edge of the 3-needle shoulder bind off. The result was an unsightly bump at the end of the shoulder:

UGLY BUMP!!

Thankfully, I hadn’t gotten very far down the sleeve, and I was only knitting one at a time. I quickly ripped it back and tried again. The result was perfect:

Ahhh, much better.

After that little hitch, all was smooth sailing down the sleeve. I kept meticulous notes as to the number of rounds and decrease placement, so that when I knitted the second sleeve, they’d be exactly the same.

Here’s me, very excited about finishing the first sleeve, modelling it for my SIL and being a goofball:

Blocking and DONE

I was so excited to bind off the second sleeve that I did a little jig. The best part of this yarn, is because it is NOT superwash, it can felt to itself. That makes changing balls of yarn a breeze. I simply spit-spliced them together!

(If you’re reading this Sudha, yes, that does mean that I slobbered all over the yarn as I was working it, but in all fairness I gave it a good wash before sending it to you.)

Thanks to the magic of spit-splicing, I had very few ends to weave in when I finished. Then, after a little lukewarm bath with some Eucalan, I blotted it on towels and pinned it out according to the requested measurements. Here it is:

Tah-daaaaaahh!

Sending it Off

I forgot to take a photo of the personalized label I sewed into it. It says, “Handmade with love by Jane”. And it’s true. I really loved making this sweater. The entire process was a joy.

I also love the way it turned out. The tweedy yarn is delicious, and since it’s a blend of wool and alpaca, it’s wonderfully soft. Perfect for snuggling up on a cold Minnesota day in midwinter.

Tucked in tissue paper, placed in a pretty box, I wrapped the whole thing in parcel paper and mailed it off with a kiss (and very detailed care instructions: DO NOT PUT THIS IN THE WASHING MACHINE!!).

My SIL’s feedback was exactly what a knitter loves to hear: “It’s perfect!”

As are you, my love. Wear it in good health and with great joy.

Freed From Food Fights

Jane Leave a comment

I was the world’s pickiest eater.

For years, all I wanted was cereal, pasta, bread, cake, muffins, croissants… Anything bready, and I wanted it. Even better if it was bready AND sweet.

My mother watched in despair (and amazement) as I somehow managed to grow without seeming to eat a single vegetable. That all changed, however, when I went to boarding school at age 14.

Faced with how gross the food was at school, I suddenly realized how good I had had it at home. I returned after my first semester away and would eat anything. (Or, at least almost anything.)

I am happy to report that I now enjoy a varied and balanced diet (though I still have a weak spot for all things bread…).

What Goes Around…

I can only imagine my mother’s smug reaction to the fact that the Bear (our second son) is just such another picky eater.

He would forgo all vegetables, and even most fruit if he could. Like his mother before him, it seems he would happily live on bread alone.

Following my mother’s approach with me, we instituted a “one bite of everything” rule. That has always worked remarkably well for the Bug, and we figured that way at least the Bear would get the occasional vegetable.

Oh, how wrong we were!

What works for one child, does not always work for another.

Dinnertime became a battle of wills. At first, hearing what was for dinner would make him cry. Eventually, just hearing the call of, “Dinner time!” was enough to set off tears.

It was a battle to get him to the table. It was a battle to get him to eat even one bite of each thing.

Finally, it came down to his choice: calm down and take one bite of everything, or go to bed. He would usually calm down and sniffle through the meal, but it made dinner time (and even lunchtime) stressful and unpleasant.

The Breaking Point

Things finally came to a head one evening. The Bear had been particularly threenager-ish all day, and when I called down to the playroom: “Dinner time!” a howl emerged from the basement.

The wailing mounted the stairs and burst forth through the basement door as his tear-streaked face came into view. We wrestled him to the bathroom to wash his hands, and got him to his chair.

When we were finally gathered at the table, he was given his usual choice: calm down and take one bite of everything, or go to bed.

He threw down his fork and screamed.

I snapped.

I jumped up from my chair, swiftly (but calmly) rounded the table, scooped him up and whisked him upstairs. I bathed him (by which time he had calmed down), got him ready, read him his story and put him to bed.

The following morning, what he hadn’t eaten at dinner was on his breakfast plate.

There were a few quiet tears, but he had understood the point and quickly took one bite of each before having his breakfast.

Then, Relief Came

I was fed up, and in my frustration I vented on a Facebook group. I got lots of sympathy, but then, relief. A friend shared with me the Ellyn Satter Institute Division of Responsibility in Feeding.

This. Was. A. Game. Changer.

The basic premise is this: parents are responsible for what, when and where to eat. Children are responsible for whether and how much to eat.

From the Ellyn Satter Institute website

Important to the process is establishing regular meal and snack times, and not letting children eat between meals.

Luckily, we’ve tended to do this anyway: we sit down together at table to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner. Snack times are mid-morning and mid-afternoon. I have a pet peeve about crumbs on furniture, so we’ve never let the kids eat anywhere but sitting at the table. That’s a firm family rule.

With that already established, putting this into practice was relatively easy. Chico and I talked about it, read through the materials on the website, and agreed to give it a try. Anything had to be better than what we were dealing with now.

Freed From Food Fights

What a relief to be freed from the responsibility of making my child eat!

The first time we sat down to dinner after reading about the Division of Responsibility in Feeding, we made a quick announcement:

“Boys, Mamá and Papá will give you food at mealtimes. We’ll decide what to give you and when. But you guys will decide whether you want to eat it, and how much you eat. All we want is for us to sit together and have a nice time as a family.”

There was a little complaining at first, but as soon as they realized they could choose to NOT eat certain things, the fussing stopped. We try to make sure there’s at least something on the table that they’ll like, but we don’t cater exclusively to their tastes, or make a separate meal for them.

Oftentimes, the Bear has nothing more than a glass of milk and a slice of buttered bread for dinner. It’s hard to take. But we’re working on trusting him to eat as much as he needs to, and on the whole mealtimes have been SO MUCH BETTER.

Pleasant Mealtimes

Now, we spend our mealtimes talking and laughing. Instead of nagging and arguing, we’re listening and chatting. We’ll talk about our days, talk about our plans for the days ahead, and just enjoy time together.

It’s just so freeing. Old habits die hard, and I do sometimes slip back into the occasional nag. But Chico and I encourage each other, and it’s so much better than it was.

According to the Ellyn Satter Institute, following this method will teach children by example how to eat a variety of foods. She does say it can take years, and sometimes it feels like it will never happen for our Bear.

But we must have faith and persevere. As long as mealtimes are a joyful time that we spend together, we’ve got to be doing something right.

Right?

Take A Hike!

Jane 2 Comments

It must have been obvious that I was not doing well.

So obvious, in fact, that my mother’s dear friend and my stand-in godmother (who also takes on role of great auntie and sometimes even grandmother in her friend’s place) informed me that she was coming to watch the boys on Wednesday afternoon and that I should leave the house.

She didn’t offer to watch the boys. No. She informed me she was going to watch the boys.

Alrighty, then! I’ll leave!

But where to go?

In the Before Times I’d have booked a massage, or perhaps an afternoon sewing lesson at a local fabric store. Maybe a mani-pedi or a visit to the hairdresser.

But in Covid Times (despite being vaccinated), either these activities are unavailable or seem unsafe.

So instead, I checked the weather report and then wrote to a friend.

“I know you’re working and you have responsibilities and everything, but I’m not okay and my godmother is watching the kids tomorrow and do you want to go on a hike with me?”

The response was swift and encouraging: I’ll make it work.

Outdoor Escape

That’s how I found myself in the car headed west on a mid-week afternoon (on St. Patrick’s Day, no less!).

I’d gone on AllTrails and found a lovely-looking hike within reasonable distance of home. I packed my hiking backpack with water, a first-aid kit, my knitting, two hunks of cheese and a Swiss army knife, grabbed my walking sticks and my mother’s old hiking boots and hopped in the car.

We met at Sky Meadows state park, a lovely park with several trail routes. After encountering a brood of chickens zealously guarding the restrooms, we struck north and tackled a 4.4 mile loop with gusto.

The first part of the hike was the hardest, but the view was worth it. As we stood at the top of a very steep hill, winded and sweaty after just 10 minutes of hiking, I thought to myself, “This was a wonderful idea.”

So Grateful

That hike in excellent company (and the delicious meal that followed!) was exactly what the doctor ordered.

So many things can crowd together to fog my mind and put me in a funk. Tedium, boredom, loneliness, feelings of inadequacy… We all have these feelings sometimes.

What we don’t all have, and what I am privileged to enjoy, are resources and opportunities.

Resources like the wonderful people who support me: my husband, my mother’s best friend, my own friends, family. Opportunities like being able to take a hike mid-week.

For these, and for so much more, I am very grateful. I hope to never take the people and the circumstances that surround me for granted.

If You’re Feeling Blue

You’re not alone. Though trust me, I know it feels like it. Depression sinks us further into isolation, which is a scary side-effect of social distancing.

If you or someone you love is suicidal, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255.

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (or SAMHSA–I know, catchy, right?) also offers a 24/7 hotline for free treatment referral and information: 1-800-662-HELP (4357).

There are lots of online resources like Better Help and others. I have no personal experience with these and don’t know how they work. Many of them are for-profit companies, so be aware of that.

If you have a family doctor, you can also reach out for tele-health appointments and referrals.

You can also write to a friend, or call. If you’re reading this and you want to talk, just drop me a line or give me a call. My friend rearranged her work day to take a hike with me. That’s what friends do. I’ll do the same for you.

Photo credit: Brittany Baker on AllTrails.com